Lads! As yer Cap’n writes this, I be just days away from me birthday. Not sure why we celebrate this day. Who wants to be a year older? Let’s face it, with the exception of the ultra-rich and the globalist elites who seem curiously impervious to meeting their maker, all of us kick the proverbial…
Ahoy, Mateys! Normally this here blog be full of good pirate-y advice on how to achieve the perfect beard and bring out yer facial glory so you, too, can be master of the seven seas with a wench in every port. Today the Cap’n has decided to turn his ship from starboard to aft so…
Ahoy, Mateys! Yer Cap’n was just surfing the interwebs to stay on top of what the beard community is chewing the fat about and noticed a very, very concerning trend: people tryin’ to sell ye shite in the disguise of informative blog posts. And all the Cap’n can say to that is “Argh!” That wasn’t…
Ahoy, Mateys! Now, as ye surely know, today is Ash Wednesday. And that means one thing – Mardi Gras has come to an end – always a very sad realization for us pirates who enjoy carousing, drinking, and flirting with busty wenches. To make ye buccaneers feel better, the Cap’n has a Mardi Gras story…
Ahoy, Mateys! ‘Tis the season. And right about now ye might be looking for that perfect gift for yer best asset. That would be yer beard, of course. (My beard’s got its own stocking hangin’ in my vessel’s cabin.) What does yer beard need in the way of beard accessories ye may ask? Well, since…
Ahoy, Mateys! It seems that our fellow pirates feel like they need to walk the plank when they gape into the mirror and suddenly see the wintry forest sprouting on their faces. The Cap’n knows what that feels like. After all, it’s why the Cap’n created Blackbeard for Men. Many lads have asked the Cap’n…
Ahoy, Mateys! Do you know what will happen next Tuesday? That’s right! It’s the beginning of November… or, as all of us pirates know, Movember. Grow yer mustache – if ye haven’t already – and raise awareness of oft overlooked men’s health issues like prostate cancer. If ye want to know more about Movember, ye…
Ahoy, Mateys! As ye know, a lot of cultures view a beard as a sign of a pirate’s virility, as well as of his social status, sexual prowess, wisdom and strength. Even Charles Darwin thought that the process of sexual selection may have led to beards. Contemporary biologists agree, since a majority of lasses find…
Ahoy, Mateys! Let’s talk about the handlebar moustache, because it seems to be trending among pirates. What is a handlebar moustache you may ask? It’s a particularly lengthy mustache, which is upwardly curved at its ends. Historically speaking, this type of moustache has been around for a very long time. The ancient Celts wore it…
Ahoy, Mateys! Once in a while, us pirates need to shape our beards. Ye know, if we go maraudin’ or if it’s a holiday or if we’re breaking bread with a pretty lassie it’s good to groom. The problem with groomin’ that magnificent facial hair of ours is that sometimes those little red pustules appear…